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roxxie_smile
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Interests: I find myself as a person who has a lot of interests in life. What can I say, life is very INTERESTING in every single way. No matter how you look at it, no matter how you perceive things in life, no matter how you play the game, things in life turns out to be always interesting.
I personally like to watch the Sun disappears below the horizon in the west, while our only natural sattelite, the Moon, slowly appears ?as I stare at the pitch black sky
Calmly walking along the beach ?while trying to capture the noise of sea gulls and the smell of the ocean
Making a positive difference ?in this deceitful world full of loneliness, poverty and pain.
Occupation: Student
Message: message me
Member Since:
2/18/2007
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| Do I really want to break up with him?
I am too disappointed of what has been happening...
Every day of our conversation... there's always an argument...
When one feels frustrated and upset..
the other feels guilt and disappointment...not only to oneself but also to the relationship...
He's been the most rational person that I've ever met...
He understands me or always tries to understand me when I need someone to comprehend me...
He's been my best friend, my video log, my diary, my comforter...
He's always there....
We've worked things out already... but it is just not enough I guess....
Should I fight harder? or
Just give up?
I can't handle this anymore.....................
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| What could I've done...
I could've just empathetically listened...
I could've shared an experience that is closely related...
I could've just said "awww"...
hhmmm i can't think of anything....... | | |
| Here I am again, starting a new entry with only garbled emotions running through me that I haven't quite articulated yet...
Today is a snowy day and all i want to do is to frolic and enjoy the fresh white powdered snow on my face...
But I can not, I can't do it by myself....
I don't want to look like I am a loner which btw how I feel today...
I think I have isolated myself from my friends...
From people who wants to be friends with me.... I mean, i know that all people like me... not to brag
but I haven't met a person who doesn't like me or hates me....
which I don't think there's such one... but it's impossible because I try to be likable and try to impress them...
that it gets to the point that I'm not being myself anymore....
I thought isolation is a way for me to be able to focus on my studies....
BUT NO, I don't need this....
I need to discipline myself... and how would I do that?
Someone who i really care about has greatly change how I perceive things....
Basically, he made me understand and realized that becoming aware of the issue is not good enough....
it needs action... action to correct and alter the habit....
I know that I have the will but knowing is easier than doing...
I love the person I am at core but sometimes there are certain circumstances that I have to act in a certain way.... A way that is appropriate...
It's just that criticism from other people affects me to the core... I just wish I have an on/off button that controls my reaction or feelings....
I wish I could control my sensitivity... not to become paralyzingly numb at will but just to be smarter on how I let things affect me...
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| Last night I have planned all the things that I'm going to buy for today...
These are the gifts that I want to give to my special peeps and for students and for the RAs...
HOWEVER!!!!!
Woke up at 11:30 to get ready for my 12:00 chauffeur...
ate at new the Japanese restaurant *argghh* I was not happy...
Then I went to the bay to look for present and of course, my hunnie came to my mind first..
first section that I went to, is the cologne "chanel" section...
--> awww...stories of "Chanel"
--> Chanel is what got me like whom I think I love <3
so I thought, I should get him that specific perfume, the only problem is that I don't know what it was...
he wouldn't tell me because he doesn't like me spending money on him... (but wait till I finish the story)
so I went around and look for other ones instead...
Another option is to buy what I want for him =) (of course it's all about US, the girls ^_^)
options of Kenneth Cole "reaction", Chanel "original", Calvin Klein "Euphoria"... and so much more
but these three stood out....
cut the long story short... I ended up buying him Calvin Klein "Euphoria" gift set with the after shave splash.... GOODNESS I ended up paying $108 for the freakin' arrggghh Cologne.. he better like it coz I like it... I meant He better give me something better than that... *sigh*
IT's funny how I told him that he shouldn't expect something big from me.. coz I'm only giving him socks!! hahaha *sigh* and HE TOOK MY WORD FOR IT!!! bleeehhhh oh well
so along with that purchase, I got a $15 store credit which I could redeem if I spend more than $50...
so here I am again, thinking of what to buy....
I couldn't take it anymore so I ended up buying the "GUESS" perfume gift set which is originally $85...
and of course came down to $70 because of my credit....
The gift set includes, body lotion, 100ml perfume, body shimmering, and shampoo and body bath....
so I've decided to just wear it on just special occasion^_^
whheewww sooo much money spent on one store....
Then I went to ardenes and bought 2 pillow flowers.. it was soo cute!! and scarf and gloves (i need it so it's okay) ... I spent $25 on that store...
I wanted to shop for more...
I wanted to buy gifts but then again, me being shoppaholic ended up buying things for Me!!! *sigh*
I mean I am satisfied but I have guild inside be screaming "WHY DO U HAVE TO BE SHOPPAHOLIC?"
oh well... I've purchased them and there's nothing I could do about it anymore... I guess...
I didn't really do what I have planned today...
I need to be really strict with myself or else ... ummhhh
I don't want to punish myself so I'll try my best to prioritize^_^
IMPORTANT THING TO DO: MICROBIOLOGY LAB!!!!!!!!!
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| Let me start this by mentioning how my day went...
I woke up at 8:45 for my 9:30 A.M. chem lab... Yes i get to sleep in =)
FInally finished the last lab for the semester and it went really well... I must say...
..Highlight of my morning: John txted me "hey honey been thinkin' about u" <33 awwie
so I went to my chemistry lecture and I'm glad I got over it *sigh
I am really lost, I have no idea what's going on and to think I am such a keener because i sit right at the very front and right at the very middle (what a keener eh?) ....
BUT i definitely need to straighten up and do work!!! That's my goal this weekend^_^
then I went to the gym with Dominique...
i really like her, I feel like i can talk to her about everything or anything^_^
I enjoy and love hanging out with her....
Working out really dehydrated me wwhhheewwww...
so I gotta go take a showeeeerr!! whoopie!! looking forward to that^_^ | | |
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